How to lead better by doing less, not more

Truly empowering people is a difficult thing to do and it’s harder than we think.  We often think that we empower our team members but really, we never let go enough.  As leaders we need our people to step up into their roles and make an active contribution, and at the same time we need to step back and let them do it.  When we let go of responsibility to someone else it can often feel as if you are giving up complete control.  As Leaders we can often fall into the trap of thinking we need to maintain control, and that we need to have all the answers.   

This is a problem because we end up creating a culture of control freaks.  We have this need to be across everything, all the detail, in case anything goes wrong, or a decision can’t be made without me, or that it has to be done my way.  When we do this, we effectively disempower our people, creating uncertainty and second guessing leading to low trust and fear.  Our people start to feel as though they can’t fail because they won’t be supported if they do.  They end up leaving us because they can’t do anything without intense scrutiny, being over riddenor left alone to get on with it. 

Empowering people is 50% letting them own it and 50% you letting go. When we let go of things it requires us to be vulnerable, which is the hard bit.  Remember that five plus five equals ten, but so does three plus seven, eight plus two and nine plus one.  There are many ways to get to the same outcome and those ways don’t always need to be your way.  David Rock in his article Managing with the Brain in Mind cites studies showing that when our people have more autonomy and latitude for decision making they experience more control and certainty which in turn reduces fear and increases trust. 

So what are some ways that we can give up control and let our people step into empowerment? 

Hand it over  

The next time you have a problem to solve, hand it over to your team to discuss and debate and offer solutions. Here’s the hard part: while they are doing this sit quietly, listen and observe. Resist the temptation to enter the discussion or debate. Our minds are constantly reviewing, assessing and developing answers and solutions to the things we see and hear. It will take a conscious effort not to get involved, but it will be worth it.  

By observing and listening you will hear potential solutions that you may not have considered, enabling the creativity and innovation of your people.  

Ask questions 

A great technique developed by Judith Glaser in her book Conversational Intelligence: How great leaders build trust and get extraordinary results, is asking questions that you don’t know the answer to. This is a good way to find out what people think about issues and how you can potentially tackle things differently. 

You could use language like “What do you think about it?”“How would you handle it?” or “What are your suggestions on how to manage this?”.  

These are all questions that involve someone providing you with their thoughts and suggestions that you couldn’t possibly know without asking. The key here is to ensure that you listen to what they are saying, and don’t discount or discredit their suggestions. Keep an open mind and a closed mouth. 

Start small and practice 

Practise being OK with some of the solutions that are suggested by your people on small problems first. Just because it’s not what you would do, doesn’t mean that it’s either not going to work or is simply the wrong solution. This is a great opportunity to help your people feel trusted, supported and empowered, particularly if what they suggest doesn’t work. Always debrief the outcome afterwards, good or bad, and ask a question you don’t know the answer to e.g. “What are your insights from how this played out?”. 

When you take a step back from providing all the solutions, you enable those around you to step up and into their own leadership style.  You are saying that you are open and accepting of their ideas and solutions, that you don’t have all the answers to all the problems and it’s OK to sometimes get things wrong as long as you learn from them.  As a result you will create a culture of shared responsibility, openness to new ideas, increased collaboration and relationships based in trust.  You’re leading better by doing less. 


Wendy Born

Wendy Born helps leaders maximise their talent and strengths to achieve extraordinary results. As an engaging, facilitator, coach and speaker, she works with executives, senior leaders and leadership teams to create high-performance organisations that deliver that WOW-factor. She is also the author of the new book ‘The Languages of Leadership’ (Major Street Publishing). Find out more at

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